Bozeman Bar Dilemma: Where to Go?

By Alison Grey, 11-02-07

It’s Friday night in Bozeman, and I find myself conflicted about whether I should brave the downtown nightlife. You see, fall marks a significant change in my life: college is back in session, bringing with it an influx of students and I find myself pushed out of my favorite watering holes by scantily clad underage glammazons flashing their fake ids and the gangs of loud testosterone driven boys that follow them.

The high heels and egos infiltrate every space of local bars completely transforming them from chill hangouts into blackout, puking bing-like atmospheres. Underage partiers pour mass amounts of liquor down their throats, hook-ups become a liability (she said she was 22!), the chances of being on the wrong end of a meat head’s fist increases significantly and ordering a beer becomes a life threatening experience as we compete with masses of booze hungry partiers all clamoring for the bar.

The non-college crowd backs away into winter hibernation, and unless we compete for bar space, our social lives are altered. We have to ask ourselves: Is the obnoxious Friday night college drinking scene worth braving in the name of a cold beer or some live music? 

Usually, we find ourselves grudgingly admitting defeat to the unrelenting and seemingly endless hoards of young drinkers, abandoning our weekend pub crawls and downtown nightlife until next summer, when the dorms empty, the town slows down and we can finally emerge, reinstating somewhat of a social life again.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, the college kids aren’t going away anytime soon and they’ll keep getting younger as we get older, but that doesn’t mean the 20 to 30-something crowd needs to completely back away from the bars into the seclusion of our couches. We’re young, dammit, and there has to be room in this town for our party scene as well! We just need to learn to live with the change of scenes and seasons, embracing Sundays and Mondays, avoiding certain bars and finding refuge in others.

Here are my suggestions of bars to avoid and embrace till next summer.

Where to Avoid:

The Rockin’ R Bar: Completely gutted and renovated from its original dirty cowboy bar into its new bleached and sparkly self, this is Bozeman’s prime spot for college debauchery, particularly attracting the sparkly lip gloss, flipped collar, frat and sorority crew.

The 317 Irish Pub: While it’s safe to enter its doors in the early evening for a quick drink, this place turns into a packed madhouse as the evening progresses. The music blares at ridiculous decibels and if you are at all claustrophobic, this place is sure to send you into anxiety.

The Crystal: Never get caught up in the hoards of cheering drunks marching down the street happily chanting, “Power hour! Power hour! Power Hour!” With ridiculously cheap drinks, this hour is one to avoid at all costs, unless of course, you are a complete masochist. Just trying to elbow your way to the bar, finding yourself smashed between smelly sweaty bodies and breathing a wonderful combination of armpit odor and cigarettes, is both physically and emotionally traumatizing.

The Pour House: With its cheap and greasy food (cheers to the sour cream fries and ranch dressing!) and drink deals, I’ve been known to saddle up at this bar. But on weekends, it becomes an instant stop on the college pub-crawl, transforming into yet another nuthouse. It’s only advisable to drink here early in the day or during the week.

Where to Find Sanctuary:

The Bozeman Brewery: Tucked nicely away on Bozeman’s north side, this place serves up quality booze in a relaxing environment. Limiting its patrons to three glasses of beer and closing its doors at 8 p.m., the brewery is not exactly inspiring for the binge crew and is a perfect place for the rest of us to meet up for conversation and a few micro-beers, especially on Mondays, when they host live bluegrass music.

The Cat’s Paw: Ok, so it’s not exactly classy, but this bar/casino is a bit off the main bar crawl and offers some pretty awesome drink deals and has plenty of big screen televisions for all you sports fans. Try to stop by on Sundays when pitchers are $3. They also have pretty decent, and cheap, food. Just avoid any dish with gravy.

The Haufbrau: My favorite dirty little dive bar, the Hauf is generally a safe haven from the downtown insanity, and the drinks are the cheapest around. Weekends can get crazy, so it’s advisable to head there on Tuesdays through Thursdays when you can enjoy live, and free, entertainment by Bozeman’s legendary Tex Tucker. Yep, he’s weathered generations of drinkers for nearly 20 years now and still strums his guitar and swoons to our favorite classic rock tunes. Besides the music, the Hauf’s patrons are entertainment themselves, from ski bums, to the chill college students we love, to the hardcore alcoholics, it’s fun to get lost in Bozeman’s Barmuda Triangle.

The Classy Joints: Usually the more expensive the drinks are, the less likely a bar will attract the hoards of college kids looking for quantity over quality. If you’re feeling classy, and have the money to blow on pricey drinks, places like Boodles, Plonk and The Ale Works are typically a nice oasis from the college crowd, even on weekends.