Bob Wire Has a Point (Under His Cowboy Hat)

First Night Idol: Confessions From the Judges’ Table

By Bob Wire, 1-08-09

	Ladies and gentlemen, Sam "Lil Bob" McCue. (Photo: Ednor Therriault)

For those of you who missed the results in the Missoulian, the winner of this year’s First Night Idol competition was Victoria Valentine, who performed a perky, well-choreographed rendition of Kellie Pickler’s “Red High Heels.” Victoria, a senior at Sentinel High School, is the younger sister of Jerilynn Valentine, who took the top honors in the karaoke-style competition two years ago.

As you may have read, I was one of the three celebrity judges for this high school horse race, along with Elton Anderson and Deserae Pollock. From the first preliminary round back in November, the whole shindig has been a lot of fun, and a very eye-opening experience for me.

My fellow judges provided a lot of the fun, with their upbeat attitudes and a great sense of humor. Local radio jock Danny D also worked the mic masterfully as the event’s MC. His devilish personality added a lot of spice and he really kept things rolling. One of his jokes during a lull in the prelims: What are the two sexiest animals in the barnyard? Brown chicken, brown cow. (Say it aloud, with a little dance move.) One of my kids had to explain it to me.

Elton, otherwise known as Mr. Manners, and Deserae, owner of Jules Model and Talent Agency, are both excellent choices to judge this kind of competition. Their experience in talent promotion, public comportment, rhythmic movement, and how to work a crowd allowed them to offer lots of constructive advice to the contestants. As for me, well, I’m good at cracking wise.

As a musician and entertainer, I suppose my contribution to the judging brain trust was some idea of how to develop stage presence, tips on how to avoid stage fright (always vomit just before going onstage, no sooner), and how to get the crowd on your side (I’ve had my problems with this one).

Karaoke is the natural enemy of a performing band, and this made it a bit difficult to wrap my head around this competition at first (this was my third year judging the finals). I’ve had my band rejected from wedding receptions and bar gigs in favor of a DJ or karaoke, and it always burned my ass that people would prefer canned music to the excitement and dynamics of live music. Economic considerations aside ($1500 for a band, $500 for a DJ), the karaoke chip on my shoulder is always there.

But karaoke is also a great equalizer, and we all can sing along to music we love, be it in the car, the shower, or the dressing room at Quality Supply (I promise, never again). So a karaoke competition, complete with a wireless mic and video monitor with scrolling words, is the best way to get the most people involved.

Each Missoula high school had at least 20 people signed up to its preliminary session, but each school had a few no-shows. Kids chickened out, forgot to come, or vomited too soon. Each year there are a few more, though, so it’s definitely snowballing. I always make it a point to give the contestants props for having the guts to give it a try. It is a lot more terrifying than you might think, being up on that big ol’ stage all by your lonesome, with nothing to hold you up but a mic stand and a pair of shaking knees.

The prelims always have a shaggy mix of the good, the bad, and the “I’m doing this on a dare” ugly. Musical choices tend toward modern country (bleagh), showy ballads, or rock hits from the 70’s and 80’s. Occasionally there’s an original composition, which almost always will put the performer into the finals.

Two years ago the winner was Alex Benishek, a Sentinel rapper who won it all in his second try with an original composition. I was unavailable to judge that year, which probably a good thing for Alex. I’m not particularly a fan of hip hop or rap, and the song, “Boom Boom Clap,” was simply “We Will Rock You” with some generic words that sounded made up on the spot. As a songwriter, I would have encouraged Alex to take some time with the words, see if he can write something that has some meaning to him other than “everybody clap your hands.” (To those of you who think that makes me racist, you’re missing the point. Rap is one of the more difficult genres in which to be creative or original, in my opinion.) To Alex’s credit, he recorded and produced the track himself, which is what put him over the top. He also got the crowd going better than any contestant that night.

See, it’s not just about who’s the best singer. I was accosted by a family friend as I exited the Wilma from this year’s competition. “I have a bone to pick with you,” she said. “That girl who won, she wasn’t the best singer. How could you pick her?”

Was Victoria the best singer? No. Did she have the best dance moves? No. Did she have the biggest crowd response? Not quite. But Victoria scored in every category, and she scored high and won by an extremely narrow margin. That’s a reflection on how good the talent was this year. What the crowd doesn’t really know is that the judges are scoring on a sheet that lists several elements such as vocal quality, audience response, song choice and stage presence. On top of that, extra points can be awarded for costume, choreography, and original material.

So, if you bother to wear an outfit that somehow relates to the song (like Hellgate’s Tess Langston did with her nearly-first-place performance of A-Tisket A-Tasket), boom: three to five extra points. Arielle Nachtigal, who had the best singing voice, also scored here. If you play an instrument, like three of the finalists did, bam: at least three points from me. If you so much as walk from one end of the stage to the other, bingo: two or more points for choreography depending on how many laps you take. Full-on routines, like Morissa Trunzos show-stopping “Mama Mia” number got five big points.

All the contestants were aware of the availability of extra points, but not all of them took advantage of it. One who did was Sentinel’s Sam McCue, my favorite contestant this year. Sam had kind of a hipster-casual look with his jeans, vest and loosened tie, and walked casually onstage with his guitar in front of nearly a thousand crazed First Nighters like he was jamming in someone’s living room. He banged enthusiastically on his Alvarez and wailed out a song he wrote, complete with rhythmic guitar breaks and lots of vocal dynamism. When he finished, I couldn’t stop myself from approaching the stage and offering him my sweaty, battered cowboy hat to pose for a personal photo. It felt like the passing of a torch; you’re going to be hearing from this guy for years to come.

For some reason, FNI organizers decided this year to do away with second and third place, so we chose a single winner. After the final contestant sang, we judges compiled our numbers, checked the math three times, and that was that. Some contestants brought nearly identical scores from all three of us, while others brought wildly different scores ranging from the high 20’s to the low 40’s for the same person. My voting patterns showed an obvious bias for anyone playing guitar. In the end, it was as fair as could be, and we all felt confident with our choices.

The First Night committee gave us little gift bags that contained several goodies including a gift certificate to Bernice’s. Last year we also got a coupon for a free foot-long sandwich from Subway, one of the sponsors. But this year, in obvious response to our foundering economy, Subway could only swing a cookie.

[Will Bob be asked to judge again after this blistering exposé? Probably. Meanwhile click back here at NewWest.net/BobWire compulsively to see what’s next.]

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