Column

Mac vs. PC: A Family Matter

I love my Mac-like iPhone, and he loves his new Droid, which is PC-like.

By Jill Kuraitis, 5-05-10

 
 

Husband and I carry on a 28-year-long mock competition about...everything. Some people think we are serious, and get squirmy in our presence when we indulge. But we’re not serious.

Okay, sometimes we are.

Things nearly came to a blow that one time when he challenged me to put oil in the car properly (thanks for the lesson, Dad) and I challenged him to sew a straight line, which came out more crooked than Goldman Sachs. But we lived to muscle through a thousand more of these episodes, and not only are we still married, we both work at home and like it that way.

But holy microchips, we’ve now hit a cultural milestone of mine’s-better-than-yours, because Husband is a Windows/PC user, and I am all about my Mac. And likewise, our smart phones: I love my Mac-like iPhone, and he loves his new Droid, which is PC-like.

A fairly new Mac convert, I spent 26 years in front of either a DOS or Windows-based PC, all the time irritated by Mac users and their claims of superiority.  It all sounded so freakin’ precious, and dinner parties could come to a halt over the conflict. In the Los Angeles of the 1980s, the development of computers was a monstrous issue, and “don’t even start with him, he’s one of those MAC PEOPLE” entered many a conversation.

Throughout the late 20th and early 21st century I clung stubbornly to Windows, although my satisfaction kept dropping each year, especially the need to restart the damned things so often, a few disastrous crashes, and the dreaded Blue Screen of Death. Windows XP was decent, but watching Husband spend days cursing and spitting while upgrading to Vista did it for me.

When my little white Acer died, and the all-Mac staff at NewWest upped their daily dose of derision to include the word “moron,” I went Apple.

Two years later, I am one of those Mac people, and I think all you PC users are morons.

Really, PCs, why wouldn’t you want to switch to a computer which never crashes, never gets a virus, and never has to be restarted except after a major upgrade, which takes 20 minutes, tops? Which never gets slower no matter what you do to it?

Okay, okay, I’ll stop. You’ve heard it all before.

I indulged in an iPhone a year ago when yet another cheap cell croaked and I got sick of having to text with that stupid hit-the-number-2 (3 times) for an “C” system.  Texting became more important with kids at college who were more inclined to text than call, and contacts in the news biz starting texting more as well. I wanted a keyboard, I wanted Mac’s user-friendliness and compatibility, and I wanted to be able to publish NewWest.Net/Boise from my phone.

It’s expensive, though it’s mostly tax-deductible. And I did have to leave the reliable Verizon and sign up with the Evil Empire, At&T. That was a big decision, but I’m glad I made it. I’ve had very little trouble with AT&T.

I love my iPhone, and use it to do all the things listed above plus a lot more. It got me out of a big jam in D.C. once when I took a long walk for exercise and ended up in a dark creepy Victorian neighborhood, without my glasses. iPhone, bright enough for me to see, gave Mrs. Magoo step-by-step directions back to the hotel. With audio. Carrying the iPhone has cut down dramatically on the need to haul my MacBook around town, a blessing which also cuts down on time in front of the computer at home.

Husband, who hates change to the point where rearranging his sock drawer is traumatic, finally got a Droid last month. He’s about two years behind his peers in his industry, but acts as if he’s the first person ever to have a smart phone. It seems fine to me, but since it’s based on an operating system called Android, which is Googlish and Windowsish, I am like the French guy in the castle in Monty Python’s Holy Grail.  “Go and boil your bottom, you son of a silly person,” I taunted.

Playing with his new toy, Husband thinks he will trump this one, and asks, “Does your iPhone give you turn-by-turn driving directions?”

“Um, yes. It got us to Alan’s godawful wedding in that swamp, remember?”

“Does your iPhone have an app called ‘Around Me’ that shows you the nearest ATM or coffee or bookstore, no matter where you are?”

“Um. Darling. Yes. Use it all the time.”

“Bet you have to connect it to your computer to update your email and Facebook and Twitter.”

“Does it magically in the air, darling. No connecting necessary.”

I can see him saying “Drat! Foiled again!” sand scowling to himself. Do I say I told you so? No, I am a nice Wife and don’t.

Big lie. I do. With a Big. Evil. Grin (and a kiss.)

With apologies to Monty Python…

BILL GATES: When I first came here, this was all swamp. Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp.

STEVE JOBS: But I built one that stays up. And that’s what you’re going to get, lords and ladies, the strongest castle of all.

HUSBAND: Jobs, you don’t frighten me with your silly knees-bent running around advancing behavior!

ME: I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper.

HUSBAND: Hey, if you’re going out, will you please pick up my dry cleaning?

ME: Sure, babe. And dinner’s at seven.



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Comments

By Brian, 5-05-10
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By bikeboy, 5-06-10
By Jill Kuraitis, 5-06-10
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By Patia, 5-07-10
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